Thursday, 26 March 2015

Dear Owls, looking up.

Dear Owls, 

At the beginning of this year, I made a list of things I wanted to get done. The funny part is, the list became a life goal kind of thing too. Since it was the new year of 2015, I made 15 new goals I wanted to achieve by the end of this year. However, what I didn't expect is that it would turn out so darn good. It had religious, educational, health/personal, monetary/business and overall goals I wanted to get done. With each category I had, I added a couple of things and thus began the triumph of my year. 

Honestly? This year started off terribly. There is so much I wish happened differently, but I wouldn't change anything. Things are finally looking up (thank God) and I'm getting used to the fact that bad things will happen and I just have to deal with it. 

In the past month, I've been at a conference and earned myself a three night stay with my mom at the cutest hotel ever; Hyatt Regency. Most nights were stressful because she was somewhat in charge of a thousand things, and although she wasn't directly held responsible- you know my mom. She'll want to make sure everything is okay even though she doesn't have to. I remember sitting in the hotel room just taking in the quiet time. It was such a peaceful relaxing time and I feel like 3 days were more than enough because I was honestly starting to miss my boys at home. I do have to mention my midnight romance with Creme Brulee! If you don't know what that is, I've added a picture below: 

For those of who you don't know what it is, it's this piece of amazing heaven that I have slowly fell in love with. It's a vanilla creme custard desert with burnt sugar on the surface and- Oh My Lord. It is just the most amazing thing I have ever put in my mouth. So... for that reason, I decided to get it every single night at my stay; that's 3 creme brulee's in a very VERY short amount of time. 

Another awesome experience was meeting an author at the festival of literature and getting the privilege of driving her to our university! I don't drive though, but I was in the car; going and coming. She spoke about her life and her husband was there too. Her name was Adele Parks and mom and I bought two books of hers after she spoke at our university. She was such a lovely positive person. I was worried it would be difficult to strike up a conversation with her, but it totally wasn't! 

Something I find extra exciting is my talk in the university for International Women's Day. I only spoke for a couple of minutes, but during that speech, I managed to cross out a goal on my checklist for the year and for my life. I spoke about Arab Women and the Liberation of the Scarf. Before going on stage, I freaked out so much, but once I got up there... it just became another goal I had to achieve. And I did. I thank God everyday for giving me the privilege to speak up and not lose my ability to face a crowd with all the drama going on.

Apart from tutoring, I've been attending many conferences and talks that go about in our uni. Every time I hear someone speak, all I can think about is, "when will it be my turn to show the world something good?" 

Soon, hopefully. 

Now, I focus on breathing. I focus on trying not to forget the good that has been given to me and the times I feel invincible. I focus on doing good to myself and to others; mostly on making a difference. Finally, I try not to hear his voice in my head. All it does is bring me back to step one. A little voice in my head that tells me, "Stop looking up, it's just the sky", because it's not just a sky. There are mysteries and a universe of possibilities and maybe, just maybe, a chance for me reach higher than my vision. 

Yours with a fresh mind and attempts at actually living, 
Happy Spring Break! 

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