When the going gets tough...

Dear Owls, 

When I was younger, when I wanted something... I got it. I'm not saying I was being spoiled or anything, but when I wanted something, it wasn't this hard.

Is this part of growing up?

Because, if tearing myself apart about things that I don't understand and crying over miserable things that I don't want to think about was life... then I'd rather not grow up thank you very much. You know, the only thing that gets me through the day is knowing that I'm not the one that has it bad. Someone in the other side of the world could be crying about their mother finding out she had cancer and she had three weeks to live, or someone just lost their job with loans to pay off and a family to feed, or finding out that you couldn't have a baby as a middle aged woman; those are things that I would find heartbreaking. But what are my problems compared to those? Do I have a reason to cry sometimes? I'm thinking that I have to pick myself up. I'm thinking that I should just suck it up and walk. Walk away from all the problems without a scratch. I'm thinking crying about my problems is not the solution.

So what is the solution? 

Because when you're down on your knees and crying your heart out on the cold floor over something that doesn't really account for being 'important', or when you're running after the one dream you thought was the one thing that could lift your days up turns out to be 'worthless, or when you're running after people who you thought would lift you up when you come to all these realizations, happen to be the ones that step on you and laugh. So when the going gets tough, what happens to the weak? What happens to the ones who are defenseless against criticism people in the world will never fail to give? What happens to the girl in the toilet weeping, or the boy under the covers hoping, or the man in the park dying on the inside and outside because he can't pay for half the things this world offers? 

What happens to the ones who are still on the ground, still, not moving, on the cold floor? 

So when the going gets tough, the tough gets going. 

But do the weak just sit and watch? 

If so, what if I'm one of the weak? What if I've got no chance to keep going because I don't stand a chance?

Until I find out the truth, 

Yours always, 

Me.